Reigniting Enthusiasm for Life

This week, I'd like to share a simple exercise I engaged in a few days ago while tossing and turning in bed due to abdominal pain. When I struggle to fall asleep, my mood takes a hit, especially if it's because of a gut flare-up. I find myself not only worrying about the effects of sleep deprivation but also ruminating on all the things that aren't working in my life.

When I can't sleep, I usually either keep tossing and turning (which doesn't help my mood) or resign myself to turning on the light and reading for a while (all the while thinking I'd rather be sleeping). This time, I decided to try another approach. Instead of listening to the familiar voice that had started to recite a laundry list of my problems and failures, I started thinking about all the things I like and love in my life. Therapists had suggested this exercise in the past, but I usually struggled to come up with much because I felt my eating disorders overpowered and robbed me of anything else, and that nothing else could possibly counteract the despair I felt. While I've finally mostly overcome my struggles with food, I have other worries that cast shadows on my days, sometimes making everything else seem insignificant. However, this time, I told myself that every source of joy I could come up with, no matter how small, would count. And the list began to flow.

I began with the fact that I love reading, always have. I find great pleasure in losing myself in a novel, exploring people's lives in (auto)biographies, or learning something new from a collection of essays. Reading also helped me teach myself French, and I've recently ventured into reading in Spanish. I also love yoga, which has been a lifeline for me. I'm deeply grateful for the incredible yoga teachers on YouTube and the variety of routines I can do at home. I appreciate how I can choose the practice I need most on any given day, becoming more flexible in both body and mind. The range of options, from sweat-inducing flows to soothing, restorative routines, is simply amazing.

Thinking of gentle movement led me to my love for walking, especially in nature. In the city, I enjoy listening to music or podcasts as I'm walking, but if I'm out in nature I prefer to take in the scenery and focus on whatever smell and sound is around me. My deep appreciation for nature led me to think about how I love to swim in the sea, or to be near a lake, or to listen to a river as it flows near me. Memories of my favorite spots at Lake Maggiore, where I visited as a child and still go once a year, filled my thoughts. I remembered the sea in Dublin, the smell of salt and algae at one of my favorite spots there, and the beautiful beaches I explored in Normandy a few years ago. The joy of a recent swim in Lake Como also came to mind.

I continued by listing the activities I enjoy with loved ones, such as having lunch with my mom and petting her dog, trying out new restaurants with my boyfriend, or going for a hillside walk with an old friend from university followed by lunch and a glass of wine. This made me realize that I can now view meals as a source of joy and conviviality (provided I have some control over what I'm eating). I started listing all the foods I love, from sushi to salads, from avocados to crepes, and the list grew quite long.

Other things also came to mind that night: the pleasure of getting a massage or visiting a hammam, exploring museums, discovering new cities, daydreaming about future travels, petting cats in the streets. I thought about the bedtime stories my bf sometimes creates for me and our shared moments watching French movies. I cherished the conversations I have with some of my regular students and the recent emotional catch-up with a former student last week.

The specifics of the list aren't that important, what matters is the impact this exercise had on me. Apart from finally falling asleep, I felt more positive the following day. I experienced a renewed enthusiasm for life. No matter how hard life may seem, it's worth living for so many reasons. We tend to focus on the negatives—what we don't like, what could have gone better, missed opportunities, and past mistakes. While we should absolutely work on improving our lives (this blog is about personal-development after all), we should also remind ourselves of what we already have and what makes our lives worth living right now. Not only because this will make us happier in the moment, but also because fostering a positive attitude will help us overcome any other obstacle.

This exercise doesn't need to be done before falling asleep—you can use it whenever you catch yourself being overpowered by negativity and need reignite your enthusiasm for life. For instance, yesterday I was having a really tiring afternoon, and I needed a boost of positivity. Just closing my eyes and spending a minute listing a few of my sources of joy helped.

I'd love to hear what brings happiness to your life. Feel free to share with us any item from your own list of likes and loves in the comments, and don't forget that you can always send me an email or book a call with me to chat about where you're at and where you'd like to go.